Uptight asians

Asian cultures have always fallen into the category of high context cultures, due to the fact that we just seem to operate on the basis of more rules and regulations and appear less liberated as compared to our western counterparts. Here is a video from the BBC sketch comedy show 'Goodness Gracious Me' demonstrating the high context culture portrayed by typical Asian parents.



Obviously the video is an extremely exaggerated act of Asian parents but the idea of that Asian parents tend to place great emphasis and pressure on their kids' studies is still very much well shown in the video. Restricted codes and contextual cues, one of the characteristics of high context cultures, can be seen here, as it is almost viewed upon as a taboo for Asian kids to not do well in their studies, and this ideology seem to be regarded more highly in the Asian society than the Western world. This is a familiar mindset of our Asian culture whereby not doing well in school is almost like a death penalty, causing kids growing up in such environment to devote most of their childhood to all work and no play. The parents shown in the video is a good reflection of Singaporean parents as they are obviously overly kiasu and concern about their children's grades even from a very young age, and also the ridiculous habit of comparing their kids to others'. Kids as young as 7 may have their schedules dominated by math tuition, piano lessons, swimming lessons, chinese tuition, grooming and etiqutte lessons; whatever those crazy parents of theirs may think of. This is the unfortunate culture that Asian parents have picked up; god bless us Asian kids.

The video also illustrates the fact that Asians culture similar to that of high context culture sees 'face-saving' as taking precedence over the truth. From the video we can understand that the father was utterly embarrassed and displeased at the idea of his son not scoring As for all his subjects, thinking that the son had put the family to shame by merely getting a B for his classical studies. We can infer from this that our culture views the way people perceive us as of great importance, we work in a way that other people's opinions about us seem to be of higher priority than what we want ourselves to be, we avoid disappointing others' expectations for us. This coincides with the theory of Collectivism whereby fulfilment of others' needs on top of our own is deemed to be necessary.

Here is another video from the show demonstrating subtle cues are more important than actual words spoken.



The video shows how the Indian son tries his very best to drop hints to his eh dim-witted parents that he is in fact gay. Such as hinting that he never brought any girls home and he lives together with his English boyfriend while the boyfriend places his hand on top of his to give off clues about their intimate relationship. The Asian culture that we are brought up in taught us to speak in indirect ways in situations where people may get embarrassed or uncomfortable by the blatant truth. It may be seen as a cultured behavior on our part but sometimes beating around the bush just leads to more misunderstandings and unwanted annoyance.

Although due to media globalization there is the increased happening of cultural imperialism in our Asian society due to the influence coming mainly from American TV, Asians very much still fit the bill of a high context culture environment. I guess the culture programmed in us is not all that easily alterable by Hollywood after all.

P.S: Last post woohoo! Thanks for all who ever commented. Til next time, BYE WORLD!

Pretty, yes?

'Cultural beliefs represent our understanding about what is true.' Different cultures do indeed have different and distinct set of beliefs and perceptions to what are deemed to be acceptable in the society. Culture tends to be passed down from generation to generation, therefore there remains the persistence in the unique mindsets of people from various cultures.

As the popular saying goes, ' beauty is in the eyes of the beholder', what is perceived to be beautiful by some may thought to be awful by others. This ideology is especially apt in this multi-cultural diverse world that we live in. In the picture above, all e women (or erm girls) depicted have just one thing in common, they are all seen as beautiful, that is in their respective cultures.

In certain Islamic countries such as Iran, strict dress codes are required of females for the sake of modesty. Women are expected to be covered from head to toe, revealing only their hands and faces, or in some cases only their eyes are allowed to be shown if stricter Islamic laws are enforced. Such dressing may be a culture shock to people like us who live in the liberal part of the world, but in the Muslim society it is just part of the culture to be covered up and it is in fact a norm to do so. The indigenous group Karen Hill Tribe, otherwise more commonly known as the 'long neck' tribe in Northern Thailand, is also another example of how beauty is perceived under another culture very different from the mainstream mentality. It has been theorised that the coils originate from the desire to look more attractive by exaggerating sexual dimorphism (the systematic difference in form between individuals of different sex in the same species), as women have more slender necks than men.

In the modernized eastern and western societies, beauty once again take a different form. Attractive Chinese women are usually idealized to be fair skinned, doe eyed with long silky jet black hair; a reflection of how a gentle and demure asian female should look. The western world however defines women with tanned complexion and toned

curvaceous figures as sexy and alluring. We can understand from these examples that culture involves the programming of the mind. Beauty is interpreted differently by people from different cultures due to certain patterns of thinking, feeling and acting that have been instilled and established within a person's mind, therefore we are unable to understand how coils fastened around the necks can be deemed to be attractive as this set of tradition has never been taught to us as an idea of how beauty can be perceive.

Ultimately we can conclude that your degree of gorgeousness usually depends on what your culture understands beauty to be, and in the current cruel world we reside in, prettiness is more often than not measured by your degree of anorexic-ness :(

How I Could Just Kill A Man

Chill not gonna kill anyone here just that this week I will be using the music video of 'How I could just kill a man' by Charlotte Sometimes, a cute and interesting somewhat dark comedy mtv, to explore the concept of interpersonal communication (:

Basically the song and video tell us about how the girl is being cheated on by her evil boyfriend, and how she goes about carrying out revenge on him so as to mend her broken heart.

Well firstly, the obvious concept we can identify here is deception, ie. parties lying to or misleading each other or concealing significant information, it is one of the relational challenges that may result to relational dissolution (breaking up). Throughout the video it is shown that the girl discovers heartbreaking truths of her boyfriend cheating on her, such as finding lipstick marks on his shirt, seeing him meeting his mistress in secret and going to a hotel together (?!?!), and finding out his love notes to her.

This links us to the equity theory, whereby individuals in relationships seek to maintain a balance of costs and rewards that are relatively equal to those of their partners. The relationship depicted in the video implies that the equity theory balance is not achieved between the couple since one is over-benefiting (the evil bf) and the other is under-benefiting (the pitiful gf). The girl who is not reaping relational rewards equivalent to the effort she put into the relationship then suffer from distress and resentment and plots ways to murder her two-timing boyfriend. Her murder schemes include hanging a pile of bricks from the ceiling, killing the boyfriend as he enters the house, poisoning of his food, and cutting loose the ropes to the elevator killing both him and the mistress (muahaha yay!). Such ideas may be comical and extreme but it just goes to prove the point that under-benefiting party in a relationship are likely to suffer from much depression and stress causing persistent unpleasant emotional responses.

The video also portrays the coming apart stage of stagnation under the Knapp Model of Relational Development. Stagnation refers to couple going through the motions of a relationship like a routine script without the presence of any joy and excitement, unlike before when passion between the two still exists. This is to avoid the pain that may come from terminating the relationship therefore the relationship persists on in an almost forceful manner. This can be understood more clearly from the video where the girl continues with the daily ritual of kissing her boyfriend goodbye when he goes off to work and preparing his meals for him, even though she knew about his affair.

Relationship between two often starts out sweet and loving, however when the balance is offset in the matter of love, things can quickly sour and the relationship may just plunge to the stage of termination before you know it. What are some of your opinions on the complicated issue of love? Different perceptions on the music video are more than welcome as well. Your comments will be much appreciated (:

Doraemon, dai suki!

This week, I will be exploring the theme on group communication through none other than everyone's favourite classic anime, 'Doraemon'! (:

A group is defined as 'a collection of individuals who, as a result of interacting with one another over time, become interdependent, developing shared patterns of behavior and a collective identity.' In the doraemon series, the group identified in the show consists of (in clockwise direction shown in picture above) Doraemon, Nobita, Suneo, Gian and Shizuka.

One of the main reason to why it is advantageous to communicate in groups is clearly explained in the anime. Groups can meet members' interpersonal needs. The 3 interpersonal needs are the needs for inclusion, control and affection. The inclusion need is the need to establish identity through associating with others; Nobita often labeled as the loser in school, seeked solace in being included in the group headed by Gian, and developed a greater sense of identity when he was allowed to be included in games with his fellow classmates. The control need is the need to prove one's worth and competence by making effective decisions, it is illustrated through the character of Gian, whom with his demanding personality, is seen naturally as the leader of the group, thus satisfying his desire to always have things his way. Lastly, the affection need is the need to develop close, caring relationships with others. In every episode of Doraemon, Nobita being the ultimate loser that he is, always turn to Doraemon for support and help in hope of receiving affection from a close friend, this action is an apt depiction of the affection need achievable in a group.

Here is a clip on an episode of Doraemon which I will use to identify different roles that individuals play in a group.



2 categories of roles played in a group can be identified from the video - and maintenance roles and negative roles. Maintenance roles are behaviors that enhance the social climate of the group, whereas negative roles are generally dysfunctional and indicate that a member is having trouble balancing group and individual needs.

From the episode, we can see that the obvious roles played by Gian and Suneo are that of negative roles identifiable to be recognition seekers. They enjoy boasting about their abilities to others, showing off their skills at playing the 'stepping horse game' in order to be the center of attention. Such roles in a group are often unwanted and usually the ones who cause conflicts and disagreements due to their self-centered characteristics.

Nobita, pressured into participating in the game, seeks help from Doraemon immediately without even attempting to try out on his own - he is the help seeker in the group who constantly expresses own inadequacy and asks group for sympathy and compliments. Nobita's negative role as a help seeker is clearly defined in the whole Doraemon series since every single episode he is bound to get himself into some sort of trouble and the very next thing he does is whine and wails about his problem to Doraemon, as seen in the clip as well. The role of the help seeker lacks self identity and requires reassurance time and again, often poses as a burden to the group.

Our favourite robot cat from the future plays the maintenance role of a compromiser, one that seeks to find solution for conflict that involves own ideas. When Nobita comes begging for his help, Doraemon with his pocket of wonders is always there for him to resolve his troubles with the many futuristic gadgets. Shizuka, aka Nobita's love interest, plays the part of a maintenance role as well, being a follower in the group who accepts ideas readily and serves as an audience. Maintenance roles are vital in ensuring the harmony of a group as a whole and are also characters that can counter the negative roles in a group thus minimising disagreements from occuring.

Being in a group is important socially and emotionally, it helps in the development of one's identity and allows for the feeling of acceptance and support. How important is a group to you? Are you a Doraemon or a Nobita? Share your views on group communication with me if you love Doraemon as much as I do!

P.S: All the best for Comms tmr my friends (:

Because I love you

The Allswell drink commercial has been having its fair share of fame, or should I say shame, recently, with the attention it is getting from Singaporean audiences.

'In a nutshell, the ad features the woman persuading her man to drink some Allswell beverage because it is healthy. After some haggling, she convinces him by saying "Because I love you". Basically the advertisement attempts to persuade viewers to consume the product through the depiction of interpersonal relationship, hoping to appeal and convince in terms of pathos and ethos.

The use of interpersonal relationship to appeal to emotions usually works wonders when in comes to persuasion, however in the case of the Allswell commercial this concept seemed to have gone horribly wrong and failed miserably. 'The overall feedback is that the the advertisement is a cheap production with bad dialogue, acting and a cheesy script to boot.' Wow, my thoughts exactly.

The concept of the advertisement is said to be based upon the idea of love and concern for one's family members, and targeted only at the local market. Perhaps it was trying to breed a sense of familiarity with the casting of ordinary local looking actors and their usage of singlish, but the effect was less than satisfactory in relating to us local audiences. In fact the first time I actually caught the advertisement on tv mobile (I think), I was in UTTER shock and disbelief at how an advertisement this lame can be approved for production by the company.

However regardless of the overwhelming negative comments, the company still managed to see a jump in sales of up to 10 percent since the airing of the advertisement. The power of media influence in perception - bad publicity = criticisms = exposure = attention. I say bad publicity is better than no publicity at all huh? The wonders of reversed psychology.

In my opinion, the weak and illogical concept of the ad not only does little in promoting the product to consumers, it brings embarrassment to the company, as well as the image of us locals; what with the couple's weird and senseless dialogue in the ad. ('uncle don nid don nid' ?!)

Allswell should seriously understand that it is just a fine line when it comes to laughing with them and laughing at them.

Persuaded by the ad? What say you? Comment and share, ehhhhh because I love you? :D

Giving violence a good name

Recently I caught the movie 'Death Race' in cinema. Here's a brief synopsis on the film:

In 2012, the United States economy collapses and life for everyone is not the same. Once a NASCAR champion, Jensen Ames, (Jason Statham), hits rock bottom and spent several years in prison. His life was improving and changing for the better after meeting and marrying Suzy (Janaya Stephens) and having a baby girl. Then the steel mill closes, and he loses his job. But that was not the worst thing to happen to Jenson that day. Suzy is brutally murdered, and he is framed for her murder. Jenson is sent to Terminal Island, the worst and toughest for-profit prison in the country run by Warden Hennessey (Joan Allen). She has created the country's most popular pay-per-view sport, a kill-or-be-killed car race where the inmates race to win their freedom from prison after 5 wins. Every inmate driver is driving a monster car that they built which is loaded with machine guns, missiles, flamethrowers, napalm, and no rules. Killing rival drivers is not only allowed, it's encouraged. It cuts down on incarceration costs. Warden Hennessey convinces Jensen to secretly take the place of the late 4-time superstar winner, Frankenstein, and wear his metallic mask in the race. If Jensen wins just one race, he can go home to his baby daughter. To get to the finish line, Jensen must kill his competition before they kill him. (source: http://www.imdb.com/)

You can have a better idea of the movie here: http://www.deathracemovie.net/ (high quality trailer can be found)

The film is built upon popular media culture today, that of reality tv and violence; bringing out the issue of how home viewers enjoy the idea of reality tv providing the 'what you see is what you get' sense of realism and unpredictability, and also how violence is now perceived to be a form of entertainment.

'Perception is the process of selecting, organizing and interpreting information in order to give personal meaning to the communication we receive'. Psychological and social factors are highly influential in the way we choose to perceive things around us, and media being one of the social factors, plays a crucial role in affecting the selection process of perception. In the event of flawed selection, as in the case of media depicting violence in a good light, perceptual errors such as that of distortion may occur.

In 'Death Race', violence in reality tv is seen as a platform for revenue and also a solution to reviving the declining US economy. This is where perceptual distortion comes in. The message that is brought across to the viewers is that violence actually has a good cause! We can use violence to save the country! But hey I thought we were taught since young not to use violence to deal with problems? I see Hollywood thinks otherwise. The death race is also portrayed to be US's 'most popular pay-per-view sport', whereby viewers enjoy watching such violent killing programme and actually see the inmates as reality tv racing idols rather than who they truly are: murderers, rapists and paedophiles. Media is indeed a powerful tool when it comes to distorting the truth, and blurring the line between fact and fiction. A famous, or rather infamous example of media popularizing a serial killer would be Jack the Ripper. Some believe that the killer's nickname was invented by newspapermen to make for a more interesting story that could sell more papers. Media in the 1800s casted Jack the Ripper in a mystical, almost legendary light, causing many to actually idolize the vicious murderer, ignoring his acts of brutal killings.

The once conventional roles of police and thief are also being interchanged in the movie. Police used to be the image of justice and authority; however in the film they are everything but your friendly neighbourhood policemen. Instead, police are portrayed to be a money-minded evil bunch who malign and capture your regular good citizen (Warden Hennessey framed innocent man Jensen for wife's murder in order to have him disguise as Frankenstein to join in the Death Race). The inmates on the other hand are almost viewed upon as heroes instead of villains here, what with the fearless and cool tough guy image they give forth to viewers. You may just be surprised the next time you ask your 7-year-old boy cousin the question of 'what do you wanna be when you grow up'. The once predictable answers of policeman or fireman may now be replace by that of gangsta or psycho!

The underlying message that the film seems to convey is that violence is cool. The concept of this 'kill-or-be-killed car race' is obviously only the toughest will survive. Is death being portrayed as a game here? And lives, insignificant? The typical happy ending of Jensen reuniting with his baby daughter and taking revenge on Warden Hennessy by sending her a bomb disguised as a gift, seemed to set forth the idea that violence can be countered with violence. What then does such notion tells the audience? When all else fails you can always resort to violence to resolve your troubles? Some of you may see this as purely Hollywood movie gimmick, but with incidents like the 1999 Columbine High School massacre (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Columbine_shooting) and 2005 Red Lake High School massacre (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Lake_High_School_massacre), both shooting rampages carried out by American high school students, I find it hard to belittle the effects media violence have on people, especially youths today. Media violence through movies, songs, internet and video games are seen as one of the contributing factors to the violent acts of the high school killings.

Personally I see media as the main culprit for depicting violence as a form of popular culture today. Younger generations easily exposed to media influence are usually the ones most susceptible to such violent culture. Violent acts should never be something perceived to be cool or worshiped, regardless of how media may choose to portray them. Violence = good entertainment? I beg to differ.

Guys are sex crazed maniacs

Now now, take it easy guys. Before you hurl abuse at me for my claim on guys being sex maniacs, have a read at this article, titled ‘Just can't say NO to SEX’, which I found on the Straits Time site by Shuli Sudderuddin. (original article found here: http://www.straitstimes.com/Breaking%2BNews/Singapore/Story/
STIStory_273853.html?vgnmr=1)

The article touches on the topic of sexual addiction as a syndrome that has been surfacing in recent times, and guess what, it is mostly MEN that are diagnosed with such an addiction.

From the article, I have identified 2 main causes that are said to trigger sex-addiction:

1) Stress is often the main culprit in causing such an addiction.
'People who have experienced abuse or neglect may be more prone to developing sex addictions.’
'Often, it manifests in people with shy, introverted personalities who have social anxiety and are under some kind of stress.’
'People with high sex drives who use sex as a way of coping with life's stresses are also more prone to addiction.'

2) Technology, otherwise known today as the double edged sword, is another cause of sex-addictions. The World Wide Web may be a useful tool when it comes to retrieving information of all sorts, but the ease of getting access to pornography and sexual partners through explicit websites, forums, and chatlines via the Internet, are similarly as convenient.

‘Three psychiatrists interviewed said they each see two to four cases (of sex-addiction) a year, most of whom are men.’

So, why are men more susceptible to sex addictions?

Putting aside the fact that most men are creatures with permanently raging hormones, could it be society’s perception of men and women that resulted in the higher possibility of men being victims of sex-addictions?

Men and women have typically been stereotyped throughout history and even up till present time as the stronger and weaker sex respectively. Men have always been perceived to be the image of toughness and strength, and more often than not, the pillar of support in a family. Unless they choose to be known as sissy, gay, or girlish, crying, something their female counterparts are known for doing when expressing sadness or displeasure, is almost viewed upon as taboo for men.

So do men lead more stressful lives due to the stereotypical image that society has constructed for them? And as a result causing sex-addiction in extreme cases? In my opinion it could be that men are more prone to sex-addictions due to the fact that they were not taught to express their emotions as freely as women do since young, therefore they are subconsciously forced to release the stress built up in them through avenues like sex, in order to retain their so-called masculine image.

What are your views on why guys seemed more likely to be addicted to sex? Do comment and share your opinions with me! :)